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Anchors of hope, Encouragement

Hurt Again? Helpful Steps During Emotional Pain

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope:

Has someone mistreated you? What now? Should you retaliate, hibernate, or maybe pursue? Whether intentional or clueless, disregard often feels horrible, so I searched for a path through that pain. Now I want to share a path I discovered that moved me toward respect, boundaries, empathy, and forgiveness—steps that benefited me as well as others. After learning more about forgiveness (often a process over time), I decided to develop a worksheet (below) that for the past twelve years has helped me whenever I’m wrestling with the costs and benefits of forgiveness. Take steps forward. Some hope for you.

And now the full story:

Continue reading “Hurt Again? Helpful Steps During Emotional Pain” →
Help from Mentor Moms, Tips for parenting

A Magic Phrase To Help Children Respond

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope:

After instructing children, do you tack on a common query of “Okay?”  You wonder whether they’ve heard you, but unfortunately, the question “Okay?” also means, “Do you want to do this?” To avoid confusing our children, let’s replace “Okay?” with words that actually mean what we say. I replaced it with two words that worked wonders in my household. What are they? Read on!

Continue reading “A Magic Phrase To Help Children Respond” →
Anchors of hope, Encouragement

Need Some Gratitude? Prepositions “To” and “For” Rescue Thanks-Giving (Plus one more thing)

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope: Who actually gives thanks on Thanksgiving Day? Do you? Will I? And what is “thanks giving?” Is it that 15-second prayer before eating turkey till you’re stuffed? No, there’s definitely more. Gratitude becomes simple when you can complete two prepositions: to and for. Give thanks to someone for something—either something they are to you or something they have provided. Do this on Thanksgiving, and at the end of the day you will actually have given thanks! Then add one more thing, an exchanged life, and you can elicit automatic gratitude without even trying. What’s that? Read on…

Continue reading “Need Some Gratitude? Prepositions “To” and “For” Rescue Thanks-Giving (Plus one more thing)” →
Anchors of hope

Incredible Creation, Credible Science, and Christmas Hope

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope:

Nature is marvelous! Scientific discoveries shout, “Kudos to the designer,” and, amazingly, the Christmas story claims that the designer of the universe came to earth. Look at the science for yourself (follow the links in the article below), and enjoy amazing things in nature. These discoveries have led me to conclude that life on earth was planned and that our lives have meaning and purpose. “God is with us and for us”—that’s the Christmas message of hope!

Continue reading “Incredible Creation, Credible Science, and Christmas Hope” →

Encouragement

A Sneaky Trust Buster. Are You Able to Spot It?

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope:  Heads up everyone! A very common logical fallacy produces misunderstandings and disappointments, creating offenses all around us. Be aware. This faulty type of logic, called false dilemma, sneaks in when we believe we know why someone did what they did without knowing all the factors or possibilities.  It shows up when we say, “Either he cares about me or he doesn’t” (which is an “either/or” supposition, assuming only two, mutually exclusive options). False-dilemma reasoning only considers two alternatives when, in reality, multiple possibilities might be reasons. Have you learned to spot this trust buster? Recognizing false dilemmas will help you build deeper friendships.

Continue reading “A Sneaky Trust Buster. Are You Able to Spot It?” →

Encouragement, Help from Mentor Moms, Tips for parenting

How Can You Motivate Children? Ideas beyond Candy and Money (and Yelling)

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope: Do your kids act deaf? I mean, do they hear just fine but maybe aren’t motivated to listen and act? Would you like some ideas on how to help them respond—tips that go beyond threats, coins, or candy? Do you hope for a more upbeat tone in your home? Over the years I have learned some outside-the-box ideas for motivating children that I want to pass along to you.

Continue reading “How Can You Motivate Children? Ideas beyond Candy and Money (and Yelling)” →
Encouragement, Help from Mentor Moms

Unmask Freedom’s Sidekick–or Ouch! (Have You Felt the Kick?)

Rita Bergen

30 Seconds for Hope:

We’re free! Yet often when claiming our freedoms, both kids and adults remain unaware of a coupled factor. Every freedom we demand will be accompanied by…  mask debates? Toilet paper shortages? (Stay tuned!) Whether impacting neighbors or ourselves, Continue reading “Unmask Freedom’s Sidekick–or Ouch! (Have You Felt the Kick?)” →

Anchors of hope, Encouragement

Dead Possum in Our Garbage. (Be Mindful of Explosions!)

Rita Bergen

trash-313711_128030 Seconds for Hope: Your mind is a powerful gatekeeper. When you are faced with challenges, the core person who is you will choose what to believe and how to think. Believe it or not, becoming aware of that fact infuses help and hope!

Now the full story:

I didn’t act fast enough when my husband, Mike, first informed me, so you could say that I brought the explosion on myself. But I’m getting ahead.

“There’s a dead possum under our neighbor’s front porch,” Mike said on Wednesday. “And Continue reading “Dead Possum in Our Garbage. (Be Mindful of Explosions!)” →

Encouragement, Help from Mentor Moms, Tips for parenting

Help! I’m at Home with Kids All Day! Survival Tips Beyond Screen Time.

Rita Bergen

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30 Seconds for Hope: Last month in our nation’s previous “culture,” your children went to school or daycare—out of the house. But suddenly all has changed. You take care of your children. At home. All day. To help you through these days, many have posted links to websites that entertain or educate kids, and that’s great—but you might desire less screen time for your children. So I’ve created this toolkit of ideas not requiring the screen as you transition into a new “culture.” You can Continue reading “Help! I’m at Home with Kids All Day! Survival Tips Beyond Screen Time.” →

Encouragement, Time to Refresh

“I’ve Failed As a Mom…” Silencing the Mom Guilt

Rita Bergen

sunset-3087474_192030 Seconds for Hope:

Countless moms wilt under the thought of “I’ve failed as a mom” when their child struggles. Have you faced that mom guilt? If so, consider this: You impact your child, but you’ll never have the last word about his or her mature choices. This means no one should ever declare you to be the ultimate reason for your child’s mess-ups. Even if you could have been an ideal mom, your child’s life could still go awry because kids have choices, too. A mother isn’t an all-powerful determiner of destiny.  So have you been discouraged, thinking “I’ve failed as a mom?” Silence that thought with this reality: “I impact my child, but I’m not the end of their story.” Now that’s more like it. Why? Read on… Continue reading ““I’ve Failed As a Mom…” Silencing the Mom Guilt” →